Friday, October 2, 2009

here we go

almost outta the cottage
Last night I got the majority of the stuff out of the cottage and moved into the Newcastle house with my parents. I wasn’t feeling well yesterday and slept in instead of going into work on time.

crazy weekend


no paycheck

moving soon... weird


There was a crazy fire that basically circled around our shop. We were really lucky to not have the shop set on fire. The Mallard Creek people saved us once again, but they do that because if we catch on fire it makes it closer to them catching on fire and with all their materials, it would be burning for weeks. Nicole and I went to Noodles and Co. for lunch and we were just finishing up and bullshitting and the power went off. Strange, I had never been in a restaurant or store when that has happened and it was the middle of the day and it was sunny outside. We watched for a bit how the employees ran around not knowing what to do and attempting to fill orders. Then Judy was calling me, when I answered she sounded really frantic, asking where we were and what we were doing. She wasn’t speaking very clearly but said there was a fire and she thinks it’s at the office. So we told her we were on our way and when we leave and walk outside the building and we both start to run and freak out because there are huge plumes of black smoke coming directly from where Performance is. I was driving like a bat outta hell to get back over there. We didn’t know what we were going to do when we got there, we talked about what our plan was to get out when we got there and if everyone is out and if everyone was ok. There were already helicopters flying around but they didn’t seem to be the fire ones yet. There were cops driving over 65 quickly heading back to where we work. Once we got to the first intersection that’s where the first block was and we couldn’t get any farther. Mat left his cell phone at home so we had no way of getting a hold of him to see if he was ok and what was going on. We drove into the parking lot where more employees seemed to be congregating. We talked to some employees from Teichert and my dad called and Julie called and we waved Charles in. Nicole talked to Shea who said they were evacuating the subdivision he was working in that is behind where the shop is. When talking to him she could hear the helicopters over him telling them to evacuate. Everything was hearsay because no one was able to talk to anyone that was back there. Judy was down on the other end of Cincinnati but couldn’t see much more than we could. My dad called frantically to see if everything was ok as well, he was out of town looking at a job. We see multiple cars leaving and we see Ben and flag him down, he says Mat was still back there making sure everyone gets out and locking everything up. Judy calls us and is heading over because she’s getting booted out. He said it’s basically right next to the shop and the cops forced them to leave. Not too much later Mat comes rolling up with my dad and Judy’s ski boat that was parked out in the back. We all sort of ended up coming together at the corner of Cincinnati and Sunset just watching. Murmurs started rolling and saying 4180, we all looked around, Nicole and I said that’s us… they had heard it was engulfed. We all started to get more anxious. I had feelings of just wanting to get back there to see if we could help and wanting to see what was going on, I felt blind. But the smoke was turning white, so we were breathing a little easier. The police officer got off his radio and called over to us and said that they were able to take down their blockade and we could drive down and see how far we could get, but they might only let business owners all the way back. Another thing that was terrible was that Nicole’s car was parked out front. We carpool for lunch and switch off days. Nicole had gone into one of the businesses to go to the bathroom and I had to call her to tell her to hurry up and come back so we could see how far we could get in. Everyone else left except us and Judy. We ended up getting all the way back in and walked around to check everything out. The wind was so crazy that if it was deciding to go our way that everything would have been gone. We had just a part of the fence that was ruined but the fire decided to turn away.

Some trees that lined up on the side of the building got burnt and it was right up against my dad’s tool shop. The Chevelle was parked out front and it looked like Mat drove up really quick. Some of the guys came back to check out the damage. Man, it was crazy though. As much as Judy hates this place I know she was sad and scared if it were to burn down. She looked like she had been crying. We helped Judy open up all the doors and what not to get an air flow in but then had to go home because there was no way we’d be able to work with all the smoke smell.

Monday, September 28, 2009

going away party

It was fantastic. There were some people that I wish would have came but it was a pretty good turnout. I didn't cry, ok maybe a little when Cassy was leaving, she told me it's time to do things for me and that I need to focus on myself and she's tired of seeing me not living for myself. Or something along those lines. I was quite intoxicated, but at the good point where I was happy and content with not drinking anymore. Malibu is always my friend. I am really going to miss everyone so much. I didn't really always hang out with people but still, they are not going to be accessible to call anytime i feel like and just invite out to dinner or go to the movies with.

One week from today is my interview with Disneyland, which I feel strangely confident about. I continue to read up as much as I can about other people's experiences and talked to my new future roomie who already was hired about it. She says it's a breeze.

Friday, September 25, 2009

I realized that I end up ranting like Adam Carolla, it's like, some things you shouldn't bring up in front of me because I have an opinion about it and I will tell you all about it even if you don't want to hear about it. And I have theories on things that aren't like crazy amazing theories of great intelligence but they matter to me.

Adam Carolla you are my hero :)


Don't normally remember my dreams, but I woke up this morning with a chill in my spine. I was talking to my dad on my cell phone as I was driving as he was dying and I was in Grass Valley. I couldn't figure out where he was and why I wasn't able to get to him but I was frantically driving to get to him but I had no idea where he was. He was just telling me he loves me and he's proud of me and he wouldn't tell me what was wrong and why he was dying and it was like he was on autopilot and couldn't hear me crying or asking questions or anything.

Stupid dreams. Didn't like it one bit.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009


I'm leaving, it's happening.

I have an interview with freaking DISNEYLAND! October 5th @ 9am

But I can't help but listen to everyone that keeps telling me to stay. It's making it so hard. I want to go, I need to go... But I'm extremely scared of all of this at the same time.

I can't stop now, the ball is too far in motion.

Monday, September 21, 2009

A dream come true....??

Yesterday I had all sorts of issues I felt naked because I left my cellular at home and went to Shann & Mike's so Shann could touch up my hair so I was just really uneasy not having my phone. Once I got home I had a couple of messages but nothing too important. I got online to check my email and to post up some pictures.....Guess who got an email to set up an interview with Disneyland?!

Ya, that's me :)


Could this really be happening?

Friday, September 18, 2009

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

worst question ever

'what's on your mind? '

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Dear Body,

I hate you. Why can't you just let me take antibiotics and not get something else from it? I was already sick for like a month and now you have to give me something else?

Fuck off.



Tuesday, August 4, 2009

It would be nice...

If i could find my cable to upload my pics from the trailer trash party and also my baking experience.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Nine lives : diana

a weird seeming look into the future, if and when i ever run into ryan 10 years down the road... not exactly but it just seems like what might happen.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009


unless i stay at home and cook this shit up and also get paid on time, this isn't going to work... fuck this, i'm becoming anorexic.

and fuck the stupid guys in the shop because they fucked up i probably won't be getting paid this week anymore. they dropped a slab and it broke into a million pieces and now we can't install so that means no payment on that job and guess what ... we can't get that material until it comes from Israel in the middle of august to be able to complete


Tuesday, July 21, 2009

i love this dude

i watched can't hardly wait last night and then just learned that Jason Segel is in it as the watermelon guy! holy crap and he was also on freaks and geeks with seth rogan..... new things to download

Thursday, July 16, 2009

today in history...

July 17, 1955
Disneyland opens

Disneyland, Walt Disney's metropolis of nostalgia, fantasy, and futurism, opens on July 17, 1955. The $17 million theme park was built on 160 acres of former orange groves in Anaheim, California, and soon brought in staggering profits. Today, Disneyland hosts more than 14 million visitors a year, who spend close to $3 billion.

Walt Disney, born in Chicago in 1901, worked as a commercial artist before setting up a small studio in Los Angeles to produce animated cartoons. In 1928, his short film Steamboat Willy, starring the character "Mickey Mouse," was a national sensation. It was the first animated film to use sound, and Disney provided the voice for Mickey. From there on, Disney cartoons were in heavy demand, but the company struggled financially because of Disney's insistence on ever-improving artistic and technical quality. His first feature-length cartoon, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1938), took three years to complete and was a great commercial success.

Snow White was followed by other feature-length classics for children, such as Pinocchio (1940), Dumbo (1941), and Bambi (1942). Fantasia (1940), which coordinated animated segments with famous classical music pieces, was an artistic and technical achievement. In Song of the South (1946), Disney combined live actors with animated figures, and beginning with Treasure Island in 1950 the company added live-action movies to its repertoire. Disney was also one of the first movie studios to produce film directly for television, and its Zorro and Davy Crockett series were very popular with children.

In the early 1950s, Walt Disney began designing a huge amusement park to be built near Los Angeles. He intended Disneyland to have educational as well as amusement value and to entertain adults and their children. Land was bought in the farming community of Anaheim, about 25 miles southeast of Los Angeles, and construction began in 1954. In the summer of 1955, special invitations were sent out for the opening of Disneyland on July 17. Unfortunately, the pass was counterfeited and thousands of uninvited people were admitted into Disneyland on opening day. The park was not ready for the public: food and drink ran out, a women's high-heel shoe got stuck in the wet asphalt of Main Street USA, and the Mark Twain Steamboat nearly capsized from too many passengers.

Disneyland soon recovered, however, and attractions such as the Castle, Mr. Toad's Wild Ride, Snow White's Adventures, Space Station X-1, Jungle Cruise, and Stage Coach drew countless children and their parents. Special events and the continual building of new state-of-the-art attractions encouraged them to visit again. In 1965, work began on an even bigger Disney theme park and resort near Orlando, Florida. Walt Disney died in 1966, and Walt Disney World was opened in his honor on October 1, 1971. Epcot Center, Disney-MGM Studios, and Animal Kingdom were later added to Walt Disney World, and it remains Florida's premier tourist attraction. In 1983, Disneyland Tokyo opened in Japan, and in 1992 Disneyland Paris--or "EuroDisney"--opened to a mixed reaction in Marne-la-Vallee. The newest Disneyland, in Hong Kong, opened its doors in September 2005.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009


ugh... wasn't the greatest diet day. i couldn't get up this morning so i decided to sleep in. i didn't get to work till after 10... so when i get my paycheck it will suck but i don't care right now, it felt so good to sleep in.

back to the grind tomorrow, stupid weekend really threw me off

and then i didn't do anything after work like i planned... well i kinda did some laundry but i just getting back into the groove of stupid depression of doing nothing and i'm staying up too late and not getting up for work in the morning. it's like i don't even hear my alarm until 550 and that just screws everything.

i just need to get out of this this sucks.

Monday, July 13, 2009

crazy ass weekend...

this weekend was long and full of a bunch of fun stuff.

friday was just a relaxing time with spencer and watching a movie... he had to work in the morning so we didn't stay up late and left his place saturday morning and came home to get ready for working out and reno. ash and i did the 11 mile bike ride up at cascade shores. it was rough and it really made me wonder if i'm going to be able to do this triathlon. fuck. it's scary. so after that craziness we met up with brit and went up to reno. those kosher cousins are crazy party girls. i would never be able to live up there, but we got some special treatment at the club we went to and didn't have to beat anyone up. i felt very good looking... i don't like to say things like this but seriously... there aren't very good looking women in reno. we stayed out late but really had a decent time :) i'm still in pain from the cigarette smoke though. sunday we drove home and luckily avoided 2 accidents, one closer than the other and i made it home later than expected but had to hurry and get ready for megan's birthday/going away party. it was decent but the sorority girls aren't really my favorite people to talk to, megan is cool, and she has a friend named erica who's was nice as well. but austin looked miserable having to hang out with them. i wonder about their relationship sometimes. they've now been together for 5 years. megan leaves tomorrow for her job training in chicago and austin leaves on saturday to texas to get set up for his job training. crazy crazy... now if spencer will just call that recruiter.

Monday, June 22, 2009

“They say California's the big burrito; Texas is a big taco right now. We want to follow that through. Florida is a big tamale.”

Ashley and I are going to Florida! I haven't told my dad and judy yet though... she told us we couldn't have any *unpaid* vacation days... and i'm like screw you, i'll take the time i want, you barely pay me anyways! ugh... and i already booked it and bought a ticket there. i don't have the outlined itinerary that we started but it's going to be awesome. starting off in ft. lauderdale and then to orlando and then we're taking the rental car up through the southern states and going up to see tony. it's going to be amazing.

things have been going alright lately... ash and i are also starting to train for the triathlon that we did last year as a part of a team but we're doing it on our own. so i'm super excited about it and i keep telling everyone but i keep getting doubts which is discouraging and motivating as well. my mom was the first one, she was almost trying to talk me out of it. then i talked to julie and she said her and mom talked about it and same thing. it's like eff you guys, at least we're doing something with our lives and setting goals and shit, i know you both don't have any idea about that. ugh, annoying!

so i also talked to spencer about moving down and everything and he is for sure going to join the Air national guard... it will be so good for him. so i'm excited. so the timing would be perfect i would be leaving for LA and he'd be leaving for boot camp in lubbock, tx for 8 1/2 weeks and then tech training for however long after that. so i'll be getting my feet wet down there and seeing how i like it and everything and we'll just play it by ear for our relationship. he doesn't want to stop me from doing anything and has already moved around and experienced living other places and i'm itching to do so. so if i like it and things are going on he'll probably move with me there and if not then we'll probably end up moving back to around here. there's places down there for the ANG down in socal so he'd be set down there too.

anyhoo... my first trip down there with intentions of making some progress is this weekend. i'm going to stay with joy and see what her situation is down there and hopefully i can move in with her once i get down there. i'm flying in thursday night we're going to warped tour on friday and then i have the weekend for relaxing and beaching and talking to her about how everything's going and if she still wants to stay down there and what not.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

why now?

do i just let people talk to me mean or mean about people and just let it happen?

i think that's something i need to learn how to stop. but how?

yesterday shann called me and since i was driving i figured i'd talk to her. when she did the photos of me the other week i made the mistake (i'm assuming it's a mistake now) of telling her kind of the stuff that i had been talking about regarding spencer in the other post and now it's like she feels the need to get on my ass about talking to him about all the stuff that's been going on. i told her i was giving myself till the end of the month to talk to him, and i think that's appropriate. but i also think that she got the feeling that i wanted to break up with him and now it's like she's trying to push that onto me. we went over to mike & shann's place after the pics and spencer picked me up from there and we ate dinner with them... so then shann proceeds to tell me yesterday that she 'sees all the stuff that i was talking about' and that mike thinks that spencer is a douche, and he tried really hard to not think that way.... so wtf? how the hell am i supposed to respond to that?

and when the doctor asked if i was OCD when i wanted to take notes at my pre op
and the vet that told me gidget was preggo when i was coming to pick her up and no one called...?

shouldn't i be having some sort of response?

but i don't...

and i don't want to tell spencer about it cuz he doesn't like them anyways so it's not worth the whatever drama...

i'm not sure why i'm friends with her, but i also don't know how to break up a friendship

i always get stuck with people because i'm too nice and take their calls, and offer to help with stuff, and be their bridesmaid....

i'm sure it has to do with the confrontation and disapproval of people, i try really hard to not disappoint people and i think i get myself into stupid things that i don't want to do because of it

and here we go again, shann's gonna take pics of me again. but hey, if she makes me feel good about myself i think i'll take that and run

Tuesday, June 9, 2009


Why is it so hard to talk to someone about something important? Something that means a lot to you?

Sunday, May 31, 2009

Monday, May 18, 2009


Here I go again... I'm starting another blog. I have LJ... and have had one forever but maybe I'll switch over to this and start over and just use that as an archive. There are so many memories in that dang thing and also a lot that aren't in there that I wish I wrote about. Plus, sadly, I still don't exactly know how to work livejournal. Just guess I never tried very hard though either. Although I do enjoy reading the community pages that are on there. I still need to check around on this and figure some stuff out.

I do feel like somewhat of a follower because Ashley & Brittney have been on here for a while and now I'm jumping on the train. I actually signed on this website a while back because my cousin Amber updates us on family happenings but doesn't do it very often. Ashley always is in on the hip and new stuff that's coming up and out. Like I knew she would know why all the Walgreens had signs welcoming Longs customers...and also Twitter, Myspace, & Yelp. Which yelp I have a little bit of an addiction to now.

In general I'm getting a little addicted to blogs. I've always been a fan at seeing how people live their life what's going on in their minds.

side note...
why does my phone only like to pretend to work!?! i need a new phone

And there I go. I need this, need that.


I really am a little disappointed about how my life is currently.

I've gone nowhere.

But I'm going to change that.

I've been searching for jobs and I'm getting a new one or two, I might need two to survive. But either way I can't work there anymore and I will be moving away. Hopefully to Southern California... then other places.... I want to live in many places and come back here and be content with it. I like being close to my family and I when I start a family I would like to be close to them.

There's so much I feel like I'm missing out on... I don't just feel it, I know it.

More to come. We'll see how it goes.