Saturday, July 17, 2010

2 of 30 — Your Crush

Crush? Oh my this seems juvenile but I think we go throughout life having these no matter how old we get... here I go talking about how old I am.... I'm turning 25 next month... give me a break!? I feel so old!

There have been so so many crushes I've had in my lifetime. The first I remember was a kid named Phillip in 1st grade... never knew what happened to him. I remember... Chris Brown, Daniel Allen.... Clint, Chris Foutch, Brent Hanson (the older guy! haha he was in 8th when I was in 6th) Adam Grow, Greyson...Matt Hamer, just to name a few...

Adam Litke... probably the biggest crush I ever had without anything happening between us. I was so stupid crushing over him for the longest time. I should have gotten the hint a long time before but I always thought there was a chance... didn't help it was in my most awkward stage of my life ever.... from like 12-15 was so so awkward... I think for everyone there is that stage and mine was pretty epic... Glasses braces broken arms acne and feeling like the fattest thing to walk around. Yep. Awesome.

There was something different about Adam that made me think that I actually had a chance with him. Maybe because he was a little shorter than most guys and wasn't the greatest looking... I always thought he was super cute. He was funny and we had a lot of things in common. I'm sure he was so miserable when we had almost the same schedule in 8th grade. haha. We used to joke around all the time and we were in band together and yeah it seemed to be the start of a great relationship haha. Every dance at Lyman Gilmore I usually got a dance with him and I could just walk on clouds afterwards. Freshman year I asked him to go to Homecoming with me and he told me yes. I was crazy excited... couldn't believe something like this was actually happening to me. Couple of days later he called to tell me that he and his friends were just going to go but he would save a dance for me. I was sad, but glad he didn't stand me up and also was saving a dance for me. He kept his promise and I was still all googly eyed for him. Later on (Junior Year maybe...) I found out he told me no because he was taking another that point I had mostly gotten over my crush so I was glad it was later that I found out or I would have been crushed. I wonder what would have happened if we would have dated... I doubt it would have lasted. But still... it's just one of those things.

I saw him a couple times after we graduated high school in Rocklin (he went to sierra college i think for a little while) and he would stop and be friendly and chit chat and that was always nice and still to this day the sound of his name makes my stomach fluttery... it's stupid but it meant so much to me then that I can still have the same feelings run through my blood.

I guess I'm just crushed for life... haha

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